Time (And a little background)
Time. It forever marches on, sometimes slowly, sometimes faster than we like, but never does time simply stop. With the passing of time, whether fast or slow, comes change. Sometimes refreshing, sometimes crushing, sometimes anticipated, sometimes dreaded, change can take some getting used to. Then, other times, it happens so softly you hardly realize a change has come and gone.
For much of my life, time has felt like the enemy; either racing on at breakneck speed, seemingly leaving me behind, or crawling by with the infuriating pace of molasses in January. For many years of my life, the march of time left me feeling like everyone and everything around me was changing, progressing, advancing down the road of life, while I was left standing on the side lines, a mere spectator. One by one, friends married, moved away, started families of their own, while I was left still single, still living at home, still waiting for life to happen to me.
And then it did, in the most amazing miraculous way. Through a series of events only God could have orchestrated, I met a wonderful man, clear across the country, with two beautiful daughters. We met online in February, he came for a visit in May, our first face to face meeting. (Unbeknown to me, he asked my parents' permission to propose when he felt the time was right. He wanted to ask them in person.) I flew to North Carolina in August to visit him and meet his family. He asked me to be his wife during a church social while I was there. Less than a year after we met, we were planning a wedding and a cross country move. I flew back in December to spend Christmas with his family. He and his youngest daughter arrived the following June (That was the longest six months in the history of ever, let me tell you!), and we were married in September. After years of feeling like my life was standing still, it now felt like it was moving at warp speed. I went from feeling left behind while life moved past me, to feeling like I was holding on for dear life as my world shifted and changed with each passing day! Before I felt fully adjusted to one change, another came hurtling at me at break neck speed. It was both extremely exciting and utterly terrifying!
We learned in December that we were pregnant for the second time (We conceived on our honeymoon, but lost our first baby just days after my positive pregnancy test. I'll share that story another day.), and our son was born via C-section at 36 weeks, four weeks earlier than we planned. If I thought time was going by too quickly before, it's even faster now! Life with a baby brings changes (of more than one kind 😉 ) on a daily basis!
Now, as I sit here writing/typing, my tiny little baby is sitting next to me, now a one year old little boy forever on the move and always exploring the world around him. My days are flying by faster than ever, filled with all kinds of crazy! Crazy noise, crazy messes, crazy love, crazy fun... I am daily finding myself wishing I could make time slow down. I want to cry out, "Slow down, little boy! Don't grow up so fast!" But I cannot change time, nor, if I'm completely honest, would I truly want to.
You see, God has ordained time to be just as it is. It cannot be hurried, and it cannot be slowed. If time seems to go slowly, there is a lesson to be learned, in patience, in endurance, in finding joy in the midst of our current circumstances. If time seems to hurry recklessly by, seemingly leaving us in the dust, perhaps it is we who need to slow down. Step away from the hustle and bustle of the world. Take time to reevaluate. Are we doing only what the Lord would have us do, or are we trying to hard to please Him and work for Him that we are doing far more than He has asked us to? Are we spending our days hurrying from one good thing to the next that we are missing the best things right in front of us? I'll talk more about the good and the best in another post soon!
For much of my life, time has felt like the enemy; either racing on at breakneck speed, seemingly leaving me behind, or crawling by with the infuriating pace of molasses in January. For many years of my life, the march of time left me feeling like everyone and everything around me was changing, progressing, advancing down the road of life, while I was left standing on the side lines, a mere spectator. One by one, friends married, moved away, started families of their own, while I was left still single, still living at home, still waiting for life to happen to me.
And then it did, in the most amazing miraculous way. Through a series of events only God could have orchestrated, I met a wonderful man, clear across the country, with two beautiful daughters. We met online in February, he came for a visit in May, our first face to face meeting. (Unbeknown to me, he asked my parents' permission to propose when he felt the time was right. He wanted to ask them in person.) I flew to North Carolina in August to visit him and meet his family. He asked me to be his wife during a church social while I was there. Less than a year after we met, we were planning a wedding and a cross country move. I flew back in December to spend Christmas with his family. He and his youngest daughter arrived the following June (That was the longest six months in the history of ever, let me tell you!), and we were married in September. After years of feeling like my life was standing still, it now felt like it was moving at warp speed. I went from feeling left behind while life moved past me, to feeling like I was holding on for dear life as my world shifted and changed with each passing day! Before I felt fully adjusted to one change, another came hurtling at me at break neck speed. It was both extremely exciting and utterly terrifying!
We learned in December that we were pregnant for the second time (We conceived on our honeymoon, but lost our first baby just days after my positive pregnancy test. I'll share that story another day.), and our son was born via C-section at 36 weeks, four weeks earlier than we planned. If I thought time was going by too quickly before, it's even faster now! Life with a baby brings changes (of more than one kind 😉 ) on a daily basis!
Now, as I sit here writing/typing, my tiny little baby is sitting next to me, now a one year old little boy forever on the move and always exploring the world around him. My days are flying by faster than ever, filled with all kinds of crazy! Crazy noise, crazy messes, crazy love, crazy fun... I am daily finding myself wishing I could make time slow down. I want to cry out, "Slow down, little boy! Don't grow up so fast!" But I cannot change time, nor, if I'm completely honest, would I truly want to.
You see, God has ordained time to be just as it is. It cannot be hurried, and it cannot be slowed. If time seems to go slowly, there is a lesson to be learned, in patience, in endurance, in finding joy in the midst of our current circumstances. If time seems to hurry recklessly by, seemingly leaving us in the dust, perhaps it is we who need to slow down. Step away from the hustle and bustle of the world. Take time to reevaluate. Are we doing only what the Lord would have us do, or are we trying to hard to please Him and work for Him that we are doing far more than He has asked us to? Are we spending our days hurrying from one good thing to the next that we are missing the best things right in front of us? I'll talk more about the good and the best in another post soon!
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